Hookup culture is cancelled: all things dating during COVID-19

YOU ARE YOUR SAFEST SEX PARTNER

BY CLOE BUTLER

During this strange time, it can feel difficult to navigate your sex life in the safest way. Although COVID-19 is not a sexually transmitted infection, it can pass from person to person when hanging out or hooking up. It is important to think about how you are protecting yourself and your partners. One way to circumvent this issue is through touching yourself! Masturbation is a great way to get to know yourself, which makes it easier to communicate your likes and dislikes to others. This could be a great time to know your body better, making future interactions with partners even better. Try using lube, your favorite sex toys, a sexy film, or keep it traditional! Also, remember to continue washing your hands and toys with soap and warm water. This is your time to self-explore. Consider supporting your local sex shops and treating yourself to a new toy or new lube. By the way, Mischievous SLC sells some of their products online!

NO CONTACT SEX? NO PROBLEM

When self-isolating, the fewer people you come in contact with the better. We encourage people to only have sex with those they live with or are in isolation with. If you usually meet your sexual partners in person or on dating apps, consider opting for video chat or sexting instead of meeting up. It is especially important to skip sex (or use virtual methods) if you or your partner is sick - or if one of you is immunocompromised. 

If sex is your line of work, consider utilizing phone/video sex as your platform. It's important to practice social distancing for your health, and the health of your clients! When engaging in virtual sex, respect the privacy and boundaries of your partners. Phone/video sex is not an excuse to disrespect the consent of another person, and if you are ever concerned for your privacy reach out the Center for Campus Wellness: wellness@sa.utah.edu. 

Another important thing to acknowledge is each of our libidos may change during this time. Often, our libido declines when we experience feelings of depression or anxiety, and some individuals may not feel like having sex. Others may turn to sex for comfort and intimacy. Be sure to communicate with your partner(s) about how you're feeling and know that whatever you are feeling is normal. 

Social isolating doesn't mean that you can't have fun! It does mean that you must be cautious when interacting with others. Masturbation or using phone/video sex are the safest options when self-isolating. 

UNSURE OF HOW TO BRING SEXY MESSAGING WITH YOUR PARTNER(S)? WE'VE GOT YOU COVERED!

BY COLTON EUSTERMAN

 

First and foremost, whether you are in a relationship or starting something new, setting boundaries and expectations of when it is OK and not OK to send sexy messages is critical. Always ask before you send, like “Hey, do you want to swap photos?”

If you or your partners are resistant to trying out sexy messages, try reframing it! Here are some fun texts you can send your partner(s): “Flattening the Curve is sexy…” or, “The better we are at waiting, the sooner I get to see you.”

HAVING CONTACT SEX? KEEP USING BARRIERS!

BY ELNAZ TAHMASSEBI

Amongst all this craziness, the last thing likely on your mind is if you have enough condoms. Tons of people are self-isolating with their partners, and it is important that we have access to protective barriers if that is our preferred method of protection. Unfortunately, the Center for Campus Wellness isn't able to provide condoms and oral dams until campus re-opens. COVID-19 is not a sexually transmitted infection (STI), but other STIs and unintended pregnancy are still a concern. Now, more than ever, it is important that we take care of our health in all aspects. So here is a list of ways to access affordable condoms at this time:

• Delivery: Many grocery stores provide delivery for their goods, which includes items like condoms.
• Curbside: Grocery stores also have curbside pickup options, so you can order online and not even need to go in the store. 
• Pharmacies: Walgreens is a great option if you have one near you, and it typically carries more options for condoms. 
• Clinics: Another great option is checking with clinics near you to see if they are open and can provide you with protective barriers. 
• Planned Parenthood: And finally, check with your local Planned Parenthood to see if they are still offering protective barriers! This is probably going to be the most affordable option, and can many times be free. 
  And remember! If you can't find oral dams, you can always cut the top and base of a condom off and then cut down the side to create your own!

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR PARTNER (OR THEIR ROOMMATES/FAMILY) ISN'T PRACTICING PHYSICAL DISTANCING?

BY LEXY NESTEL

You've been diligent about social distancing, but your partner or their family/roommates have not been, what do you do? It can be really tricky balancing the desire to be with your partner while maintaining your commitment to physical distancing. Personally, it has been hard for me to rationalize this dilemma. You can choose to see them, but then all your efforts go down the drain. You can ask them to be better about physical distancing, but that may be a very uncomfortable conversation or flat out impossible for them to do (especially if they have no other living options). You can also just distance yourself from them, which is the safest option, but it can also feel lonely.

So what is the best option? It is important to have an honest conversation with your partner with what will work best for you and your situations. I have been physically distancing from my partner for the last two weeks (the longest time we have spent apart since we have been together) so we can see each other this weekend, then they can spend time with their family afterwards. Since their family has not been social distancing, we have decided that after the weekend, we will wait another two weeks to see each other in person but will continue to see and talk to each other virtually in the meantime. Again, there is no one-size-fits-all way to navigate these tricky situations, but talk to your partner honestly and figure out a strategy that works for both of you.